


On bad nights

by Dissent



Category: DRAMAtical Murder - All Media Types
Genre: Fluff and Angst, Gen, Late at Night, M/M, Nightmares
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-23
Updated: 2019-05-23
Packaged: 2020-03-13 07:00:02
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 681
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18935797
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Dissent/pseuds/Dissent
Summary: There is a harsh difference between Noiz' good and bad nights.





	On bad nights

Noiz will kick him out whenever he has a nightmare.

Literally out of bed and out of the room altogether.

At least once a week Koujaku will find himself roughly shoved off the mattress, still tangled in the bedsheets, with aching shoulders or hips (the floor he has just slammed down onto isn't called hardwood floor for fun) and all because Noiz is screaming and trashing in his sleep as if he's being tortured in the worst way possible. It usually takes from two seconds up to a few minutes to shake him fully awake and when he finally opens his eyes and pants and shakes, Koujaku can't even touch him if he doesn't want to earn a broken wrist or bruised chin or severe injuries on whatever part of him Noiz can reach first with teeth and clenched fists.

On the good nights, Noiz just points at the door and gasps and chokes on his own breath, but he doesn't cry.

So on the good nights, Koujaku does what's being asked of him - he gets up and leaves the room, but he always makes sure the door stays a tiny bit ajar, enough for a ray of light to creep into the darkness and make Noiz feel a little less alone, a little more safe. Then, he'll settle in the living room and switch on the TV just to glance at it with bleary eyes, watching as some midnight program flickers across the screen.

On the good nights, he always mutes whatever show is playing, waiting for the quiet gasps to die down, listening intently for any kind of sound that resembles his name being called in the slightest so he can get up and return to the bedroom, adjust the sheets and tell Noiz that it's late and that they should sleep.

On the good nights, if he offers anything else than the opportunity to forget what has just happened, Noiz hisses and yells and screams and curses because he doesn't want comfort and pity and soft spoken words and he doesn't want to talk about it either - he wants to pretend that he's fine so he can actually think that he's fine and Koujaku understands.

Walls aren't just there to stop others from getting in, they are also meant to stop certain things from getting out.

On the bad nights, Noiz stares blankly ahead for a moment, then doubles over on the bed, curls into a ball and starts sobbing like a child, all while Koujaku is doomed to sit and watch and feel angry and frustrated because Noiz doesn't even let him get closer.

On the bad nights, he leaves the room and closes the door firmly, turns up the volume of the TV until his ears hurt and his still drowsy mind is crying for him to silence all those incredibly irritating sounds, but he refuses because Noiz is suffocating on his own screams and sobs and he doesn't want to be heard and Koujaku understands.

Sometimes, walls break and then it's better to turn away until they're fixed.

On the bad nights, he doesn't try to go back into the bedroom. He waits for minutes and hours and sometimes he dozes off, but then, at some point, Noiz comes to him out of own accord. He has puffy eyes from crying and shaky hands and sometimes, he has bruises and cuts from accidentally or intentionally hurting himself and even from just looking at him, Koujaku knows that he has a headache.

On the bad nights, Noiz accepts almost everything he refuses on the good nights. He wants comfort and pity and soft spoken words as he crawls onto the couch alongside Koujaku and curls into him with every inch possible because he's scared and hurt and still just a child that has to be an adult everyday.

And there, cramped up and uncomfortable and in front of the still switched-on TV that's too loud with all lights shining, they fall asleep in eachothers arms, because walls can be joined and shared in nights like this.

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this at like 23:27 in the evening on a whim so sorry if it's crappy (ಢ_ಢ) I have two presentations, a test and latin class after school tomorrow and I should be asleep lmao but I live for those two angsty bois
> 
> xoxo
> 
> (◕‿◕✿)


End file.
